Attack of the Smug Marrieds

Tonight, one of my friends and his soon-to-be wife had their annual Christmas party. I arrived before several of my other friends, and sat around with 6 married/almost married couples. And listened to them speak about their weddings/future weddings/babies on the way. Don't get me wrong; I am happy for all of my friends. I love them dearly, and we are like a family. But it is so hard to be that lone single girl sitting around with happy couples, listening and watching them talk about their lives and how in love they are and blah blah blah. It makes me feel like shit. I am sure these are my own ridiculous issues, but I feel so alone whenever I am with them. I finally couldn't stand it anymore today and had to leave. Went to meet a few girl friends from work at a local bar. Came home to my cat. How pathetic am I? Last night I was with a man whom I don't believe really gives a shit about me in any more than a physical way. And this was AFTER I was stood up by a different man who I thought was interested. Apparently I was wrong. But tonight just reinforced how lonely and shitty I feel lately. This happened last year too. I think it is the holidays. I think it is a slap in the face about how totally alone I am. It is pretty obvious I have major issues.